Proclamation
Mania
Here we are a couple weeks into the New Year and every
other post in my social media accounts is still a resolution themed ad. Somehow
the internet algorithm gods figured I must be in need of some mythical superfood
supplements and all THE best kept secrets in fat blasting exercise gadgets. Ah,
no.
Next up are those making proclamations to hit the
ground running as they resolve to crush their goals of “beating yesterday” and
“owning tomorrow.” And last but not least, we have the ‘health coaches’ falling
over themselves offering up their “crushing/beating/owning” assistance. It all
sounds a little violent, don’t you think?
Yearning
for Yesterday
There was a time when this kind of stuff was right
up my alley. I lived for diet and exercise and would have been first in line to
sign up for the ‘fresh start challenge du jour.’ I spent oodles of time logging
my work outs and tracking my weight and body measurements, I even became a
certified fitness trainer! All was done in an effort to keep improving, to “beat
yesterday” as well as to beat chronic illness. I loved kicking my own ass!
Eventually, my health issues became more and more time
consuming and I gradually let my certifications expire and my detailed tracking
slide. And anytime I experienced a setback, I counter-attacked with a miracle fix,
usually born out of desperation to keep fighting for gains. When a fix ceased
to work, I figured I must have done something wrong because lord knows the diet
and exercise regimens never took responsibility.
As my health tanked, I continued to exercise but it
wasn’t the same. With every ‘what’s the point’ workout I mourned my old self
and carried sadness in my heart. Instead of enjoying a two mile walk, I’d be zeroed
in on the fact that I used to run six miles in the same amount of time (conveniently
forgetting the damage done to my knees and feet.) Never the less, I was
resolute in my mission to someday get back to where I was, to “rediscover
yesterday.”
Moving On
It took some time (and therapy), but soon enough I
realized beating myself up (mentally and physically) was not helping the
situation. I let go of dieting, supplements, and the belief I needed a super
structured work out regimen. And the best part of it all is I have learned to
accept my new and ever changing normal.
I’ve recognized yesterday
is not something to beat or yearn for; it’s gone. I am not who I was yesterday
and that can be a good thing.
I honor myself where
I am at. Whether it be stacking firewood or enjoying a nap, it’s all good.
There is more to me
than my physical body; as long as I am happy and comfortable, that should
enough.
I can set realistic
goals and I don’t need to crush them in order to feel accomplished or adequate.
Accept
Yourself
I don’t believe I can do anything to stop
Proclamation Mania from bubbling to the surface every January but I can do my
best to ride the wave. And I can make a simple request, if you are considering
adding the act of ‘beating yourself’ as part of a health and fitness resolution
this year, I challenge you to take a moment to reconsider and add the radical act of ‘accepting
yourself’ instead. I think you will find yourself pleasantly surprised.
