Reflect, Appreciate, and Prepare

Winter is a most mystical season! Just take a look at the natural world around us. During the frost of winter, plants submerge their essence into their roots, animals thicken their hides, and ponds harden into ice. This is a time of apparent inactivity yet beneath the stillness there is a hubbub of hidden happenings. Gestation and incubation are bubbling away in preparation for the renewal of spring.

What’s happening in nature is echoed in us. Like it is for the plants and animals, winter is a crucial time for humans to slow down, take stock, and accumulate reserves so we can be at our finest when it's time to spring forward. The short days and the long nights afford us time to look deeply into ourselves and reflect on the past year, appreciate our present, and prepare for the coming year.

But alas, the magic of winter is often over-shadowed by the frenzied bustle of the holidays, jam-packed schedules, and the flu; all poised to deplete our energies. So what to do? I would like to offer a short list of four practices I have found to be supportive and restoring.

Thoughtful Activities:

Techniques such as, meditation, prayer, journaling, and counseling can help move awareness of our deeper desires into our conscious mind. These tools have the ability to calm our emotions, relax the mind, and raise our spirit; just the thing for a cold winter’s night.

Phone A Friend:

The winter months can be isolating for many. This is a great time to reach out and reconnect. Write a letter, send a text. Hold a door, share a smile. Ask for help.

Seek Inner Warmth:

Maybe it’s time to reconsider that breakfast smoothie habit (just for the season) and opt for warmer sustenance. When cold weather strikes a chilling blow, warming and concentrated foods such as soups, stews, and porridges should take center stage.

One of my favorite go-to recipes for winter is Commonweal’s Most Nourishing and Healing Tea from Rebecca Katz, a delicious concoction reminiscent of a chai tea. Rebecca affectionately calls it, “… a backrub in a cup” and I agree!  nourishing-and-healing-tea-recipe

 

Express Gratitude:

Be thankful for every day, every moment! Let me start by saying “thank you” to each and every one of you that has read my blog and offered your encouragement. It means more to me than you might ever know. My hope is you will welcome the arrival of winter and rejoice in this beautiful season of reflection, appreciation, and preparation!

"Winter is the time for comfort, for good food and warmth, for the touch of a friendly hand and for a talk beside the fire: it is the time for home." --Edith Sitwell

Three Little Birds

Several years ago, I attended a conference presented by the Center for Mind Body Medicine (CMBM). The mindfulness exercises led by Dr. James Gordon were something special. The following is a remembrance of one of them.

Give Me a Break

It was day two and 3:00 in the afternoon, time for a much anticipated (and needed) break. Dr. Gordon instructed us to stand and close our eyes. He was going to play some music and we were going to systematically shake our bodies. We started from the ground up, gently bouncing, moving our ankles, knees, and then hips. Continuing up the body, we moved our torsos, shoulders, arms, and head. We shook like this for six minutes to a hypnotic techno-instrumental. Dr. Gordon counted the minutes and encouraged us to keep shaking, keep moving! Even though the last minute felt like eternity, my eyes were closed, my body was shaking, and for a moment I felt as if I were alone in the room (Actually, I was one of 400).

Cries with That Shake

The music stopped; we opened our eyes. In preparation for part two of this exercise, Dr. Gordon instructed us to take a few slow, deep breaths. I was a bit worn out and hopeful part two would not involve more shaking. Dr. Gordon asked us to close our eyes again and this time we were to move our bodies in whatever way would feel good. The music began; I started to sway and then I started to cry. The song he played? Three Little Birds, by Bob Marley.

I’ve heard this song a million times before but this was different; why the tears? At the time, I was a medical hot mess, lots of tests, waiting for results, and fretting about what the future may hold. As Bob Marley sang to me, “Don’t worry, about a thing, 'cause every little thing gonna be all right” I realized my body may have been in the room but my mind was nowhere to be found. I became painfully aware I had let my personal situations weigh on me to the extent that I was no longer a participant in my own life! Those six minutes shook the weight off of my shoulders and Mr. Marley brought me back, front and center, to the present moment.

Embrace the Moment

As I reflect on this day, I like to view it as a microcosm of my life. While there have been many times I have desired to be ‘anywhere but here’, something inevitably shakes me into remembering there will never be another precious moment exactly like the one I’m in and not to fret because “every little thing gonna be all right.”

Three little birds, pitch by my doorstep

Picking Battles

Every day offers plenty of opportunities to get angry, stressed or offended. When I think I have it all figured out, that’s usually when I am at my most wrong.

Your Arms Too Short to Box With God

During a recent appointment with my ophthalmologist, I had an NF related question she couldn’t fully address. When she suggested I make an appointment with the NF specialty clinic, I balked.

“Ugh, I haven’t been there in years! It takes forever to get an appointment and they hardly ever run on schedule.”

She simply smiled and replied, “Well, it is a specialty clinic. Bring a book.”

(OK, let me try something different)

“They tell me my NF is mild and insist on scheduling me with the nurse practitioner. I rarely get to see the neurologist.”

“Kelly, your case is mild. I have patients with NF that are blind.”

(Let me try one more thing)

“Not to mention a whole day will be shot, it’s a two hour round trip, and parking sucks.”

She just gave me a shoulder shrug for that one.

I realized I had said too much and she wasn’t having it. I think I apologized for taking up too much of her time as I was leaving.

Drive Angry

I seethed as I drove home. For starters, I couldn’t bloody see! My eyes were dilated and the sun was blazing making driving a bit sketchy but most of all, I was angry at myself. I had wasted valuable appointment time ranting on about issues my doctor has no control over and didn’t seem interested in listening to. And I apologized!

So I did what any irrational adult would do, I decided to mock my doctor by repeating the words, “Bring a book” in as many annoying voices as I could.

Still Learning

After I had some time to calm down and reflect upon the battle of wits I had with my doctor, I came to some realizations.

Nothing is gained by turning a conversation into an argument. All I had to say in response to her suggestion was, “Thank you, I will consider that.” Why is offering up excuses and explanations such a hard habit to break? Sharing my negative clinic experience served no constructive purpose. If I truly want to take it up with someone, it will be with the clinic coordinator.

Minimalizing how another person experiences life’s curve balls is never cool. I am fully aware my case of NF is mild compared to some. Others have it worse, I get it. But that doesn’t mean my concerns are not valid. Still, I need to remember there will always be someone at the ready to remind me; I have no control over that. I do however, have control over how I react and respond.

I will never again apologize for taking up a doctor’s time; it’s my time as well. They provide services I need and am willing to pay for. I’m not in the habit of scheduling office visits because I’m lonely and feel like a chat.

I don’t have to follow every suggestion a doctor makes. If I went to see a new doctor every time a doctor told me to, I’d never have any kind of life. Sometimes you got to break the chain of referrals. At the moment, my NF isn’t much of a bother. I know my body and I’ll go when and if I feel it would be of benefit. And yes, if I go I will most likely have to wait. I guess I’ll bring a book.

All photos from pixabay