When I’m feeling overwhelmed by my chronically
confounding life, it can be tempting to give up on myself. Sometimes the
thought of curling up into a ball and cursing whoever or whatever caused my
pain is the best I’ve got. As fun as that seems, it’s not a sustainable long
term plan. Eventually I will have to get up and deal with the issue. But what
if I’m not quite ready to rumble? That’s when distractions can come in handy.
Distraction
Not Denial
Finding healthy ways to distract from unpleasant
emotions is one of the distress tolerance techniques I’ve learned while in
therapy. Putting a vexing situation on the back-burner, albeit temporarily, and
putting something else first in my mind buys me some time so when I’m ready I
can cope with the unpleasantness in a beneficial and productive manner.
So Kelly, what exactly are these distractions you
speak of? I’m glad you asked! I use activities that I find to be pleasurable.
Making
a List
The first step was to sift through a list of 100+
pleasurable activities and check all that piqued my interest. I was skeptical
at first because I’ve read many books of lists promising a fix for a broken
life: 50 Ways To Do This, The 10 Best Whatevers, blah, blah, blah.
I always thought, “I wouldn’t do any of this crap!” or “Who has time for this
nonsense?” This time was different as I had someone guiding me through the
process of creating a personalized list.
Next, I narrowed the list down to the 15 (that I
would actually do) and finally, grouped those 15 into three lists of 5 (an A
list, B list, and C list). The following is what I came up with.
A list:
Cook favorite meal, Blog, Work outside, Take photographs, Long and peaceful
walk
B list:
Exercise, Go out to eat, Listen to radio, Play loud music and dance, and Take a
nap
C list:
Internet shop, Go out for coffee, Go to a mall/park and people watch, Read
favorite book, Write a letter to someone
Distraction
Before Action
My list of pleasurable activities offers a ‘pause
button’ for my life. I know going out for coffee won’t cure my Crohn’s and
taking a walk doesn’t pay the bills. Embracing distraction affords me the
opportunity to coolly evaluate negative situations rather than become further
overwhelmed by them. And when I’m ready to ‘press play’ again, I can do so with
no fear. I got this.
Sometimes
I feel
I've
got to
Run
away
I've
got to
Get
away
From
the pain you drive into the heart of me
–Tainted Love written
by Ed Cobb
