Previously
on WDTM
Last fall when my GI doctor brought up the subject
of stopping my Crohn’s medication, I was skeptical. I thought chronic illness
required chronic medication. Well, that’s not always the case. Recent research suggests
IBD patients who have been in remission for five or more years and have stable
lab values (like me) could most likely stop their medication with minimal risk
of a flare. He told me to think about it, and we would discuss again after my
colonoscopy in the spring.
Fast
Forward One Year
All went well with the scope (the-patient-is-fine), we revisited the subject of stopping my medication and I decided to go
for it! I relegated my pill case to the junk drawer and have been medication
free for the past four months. Last week at my follow up appointment my doctor
informed me that all my lab values looked great, vitals were good, and he saw absolutely
no signs of active disease! He said I could continue to be medication free and wouldn’t
need to return or get labs drawn until April of 2019!
As I walked out of the office, a mix of emotions
came over me. Of course I was thrilled to receive a positive report regarding
my health and yet I was a wee bit scared of my new found freedom. No pill case
to fill and no blood draws or office visits, is this heaven? As I drove home I wondered,
“Am I allowed to feel this way, feel normal? Am I still ill if I no longer have
a pill case to fill? What if I flare?” Oh boy!
Be
Grateful For Whatever Comes -Rumi
Upon returning home, I took
some time to process the thoughts and fears running through my mind. I determined
my life and health status are not defined by the number of pills in a case or
trips to the doctor. I am more than Crohn’s. So, hell yeah I’m allowed to feel
normal and savor every minute of NOT filling a pill case or seeing a doctor. Yes
I’m still ill; though Crohn’s is quiet, I have other health issues still in
need of tending. And if Crohn’s decides to get noisy, I’m fine with that. I am
content to enjoy my medication free moment for however long it lasts. And if I
need to retrieve my pill case, I know exactly where to find it.
